Falling Asleep

Sometimes falling asleep feels next to impossible. Twisting and turning for hours isn't uncommon, in some ways, it seems normal. I wear a sleep mask so light doesn't bother me. There've been times, though, that it gets very hot. I can't sleep without it so I just have to deal with that. Temperate affects me more in general since I've had a stroke and often I feel too hot, then too cold, then hot again and I sweat and then I'm wet and I start to shiver. It's a process I'm used to, but it's not fun. While I was making this website, I wound up staying up for a few nights and working for long stretches at a time. When I decided to get on a normal schedule, I was used to not sleeping and I couldn't fall asleep no matter how hard I tried. I drank three ciders, which make extra so wobbly and it's difficult to walk. Alcohol usually helps me sleep. No dice. On top of that, I took Mirtazapine and Trazodone, which were prescribed by my doctor for that very reason. That didn't help either. They just make it more difficult to function. If I have to get up I walk like the town drunkard, stumbling and holding on to walls or whatever else I can reach for support. I also took Melatonin. I have two different strengths and I took the more powerful of them, hoping that would help me. Nope. The combination of sleep drugs and alcohol makes it so difficult for me to do anything so after not succeeding to get any rest for hours, getting up and operating normally isn't a feasible option. It's almost 8 am while I'm writing this. I have to be awake in a few hours for grocery delivery. I guess I'll roll around in bed for a few hours until an hour before cos it takes me that long to get dressed and ready. My life is not easy.